It’s funny how we can look back at our history with more clarity than we can see the present. It’s like humans are near-sided to the tale being told at any given time -- and I don’t mean the obviously big stuff like presidencies or pandemics (funny that that is now a thing 😷), I mean the small stuff that happens on a daily basis, for women, and families, and cultures. The stuff that adds up to big history in the end, but might seem mundane or trivial in the moment.

I am by nature a history buff, and I love a good story (almost more than a charcuterie board 😋), but when I start to think about Women’s History or Women’s Day, I get overwhelmed. Not just by all of the incredible stories, accounts, pivotal moments, and women’s lives that have been recorded, but by all the ones who have been overlooked or forgotten. Where to begin? What to focus on?

It struck me when I started thinking about women, their history, their lives, their hopes, and their aspirations, that while our past is immensely significant, and has shaped the moment we live in now, the NOW is what is creating, shaping, and molding our tomorrow. What we do, believe, and hold dear now will form a future that is going to be the now of our daughters’ and granddaughters’ lives.

So instead of recapping, or analyzing, or storybooking the past, I decided to talk to some incredibly wonderful and independent women I know for this post. I also included some of my own comments too -- for good measure 😍. 

Here’s what we have to say about our lives, our past, and our future, as women, together.

In one sentence, how would you describe yourself?

Elise Michaels, Mother, and owner of Elise Michaels Media - I would describe myself as a curious-minded, creative-leaning woman who is constantly learning - usually from my own mistakes.

Rachel Bryan, Mother, and Digital Marketing Manager - A mess - LOL 😜? I would say that I am a working mom who is constantly trying to keep my grip on being hip to the point that it's embarrassing. Also, I am a forever-work-in-progress. 

Raena Boston, Mother, and Founder of The Working Momtras - An ambivert seeking the right balance of people-ing and alone time.

Elisabeth Thomas (Me!), Mother, Founder of Summary Content Marketing and Entreprenista Mama - Total type-A, creative nerd, on a mission to find the most amazing athletic leggings on the market, and a balance between motherhood and all the rest. I’ll let you know when I find that holy grail. 😉

Do you have an easy or hard time talking about yourself? Why do you think this is? 

It is easy for me to write about myself, but not talk about myself. In conversation, I prefer to center on other people. I’m good at introspection and would prefer to dissect myself on my own time. I'd much rather hold space for someone else than the other way around. Why? Good question. Let me introspect 😉. - Raena Boston

Having been in radio for 30 years made me be able to talk about myself pretty easily. Although I really consider myself to be on the shy side, that's usually because I'm busy watching others and taking it all in. I could be very happy at a party as the person people-watching in the corner. - Elise Michaels

I have a hard time talking about myself unless it is with the purpose to connect with someone else. I love to identify common threads with people to build connections. But if I were to have to sit on a panel and talk about my accomplishments I would completely shutter. I think as kids, especially growing up in the ‘80s and ‘90s, there was not a big emphasis on women's empowerment. It was almost a quiet whisper of "you can do whatever you want, just don't brag about it." - Rachel Bryan

If I’m talking about things I’ve checked off the life-list, my children or my family, I’m able to share openly and with pride, but it’s super hard for me to talk about myself, my qualities, and my inner thoughts openly. I’m always a little afraid that if I put it out there, it won’t happen. Maybe that’s something I’ve learned from our “seen and unseen” culture when it comes to women -- not sure, but definitely curious 🤔. - Elisabeth Thomas 

What does International Women's Day mean to you? 

International Women's Day has two meanings to me. First, it is a day to acknowledge and celebrate the amazing women who have impacted my life. I think about it often - how my mom, my close friends, former bosses and colleagues, comrades I have lost touch with have all impacted every facet of my life. - Rachel Bryan

I never really used to think about it or what it means, until more recently. The smaller our world gets, and I suppose the older I get, the more I see and celebrate women around the world who are making a difference, changing the world around them, being fully involved. - Elise Michaels

It's a day where women get their due. It's a day of celebration because we keep the world spinning. Can we get the day off, though? - Raena Boston

I hate to sound like the cynic of the group, but International Women’s Day has always felt to be a little like giving a woman a congratulatory poster board when what we really need is a mic and a seat at the table. I hope my feeling about the day changes over time. - Elisabeth Thomas

What do you think of first when you hear Women's History Month? 

I think that it's sad we need to be reminded to tip our hat to women who have made the world work. I feel like we are only now acknowledging amazing women whose accomplishments were life-changing. Look at the women of NASA: they were the brains behind the ability for man to make it out of our hemisphere and fly into space. Think of all the men who took credit for that! Sister Rosetta Tharpe was the true innovative rock & roll guitarist, but men ripped off her licks and sound, then took the credit for it. And all of the other inventions and accomplishments over the past 10,000 years that were created because a woman made it happen! It really should be a daily acknowledgment. - Elise Michaels

An opportunity to relearn history as a whole. Growing up we really learned a whitewashed, male-centric version of history. As the years have passed stories of amazing, courageous women have emerged and I almost feel cheated. I learned about Betsy Ross in school. But where were the stories of women in science, women at the frontlines of the battlefield? Those stories existed, but have only been told over the last few decades through art - movies, TV, songs, literature. - Rachel Bryan

Much needed. I want to hear everything women have accomplished and what we're working on. - Raena Boston

I immediately think of all of the women in my family, and circles of friends who have passed on the tales of incredible women through their own storytelling, sharing, and writing. While so many of these figures didn’t make it into the history books, they’re in our hearts and our minds as we teach our own daughters what it means to be a woman. - Elisabeth Thomas

Of the women in your life, who do you look up to or respect the most? Why? 

Good question! There are so many. My grandmother, who has passed away. She was empathetic. She smelled and felt like love. I wish I had her perspective in my adult years in my role as a mom. - Raena Boston

I'd have to say my mom is my biggest influence. She never gave in to stereotypes, and always supported me to do what felt most important to me, whether it was appearing in theatre from a young age, playing music, or moving to the other side of the country. She showed me to follow my heart by going to school while raising 5 kids and graduating college at 50 years old. She also led the way in the early days for our era to start recycling. All the while never putting up with anyone's bullshit... she stands strong in her convictions to this day. - Elise Michaels 

The easy answer would be my mom, but I often consider the full impact of all the women I have had the pleasure of sharing some segment of my life with. From each woman - friend, colleague, boss, mentor, family - I have gained something special. Confidence, assurance, kindness, humor, compassion, and perspective are all things gained from the women in my life and I try to celebrate it every day by giving back to other women in my daily life through kindness, support, friendship, and in some special cases mentorship. - Rachel Bryan

I can’t pick just one! I’m so grateful to my mama for teaching me to see the good in all people, to my grandmother for showing me the fun and beauty in life, and to my sisters for always being there, never judging, and forever opening my eye to alternative perspectives to my own thought process. Most impactful in my life now is my daughter. Her courage, honesty, and kindness keep me learning and growing. I want to be like her when I grow up! - Elisabeth Thomas

Are there two-three women from history that inspire you or bring you joy? 

When I was little I desperately wanted to be an investigative reporter from the New York Times. This was due to the story of Nellie Bly. She was the first female investigative reporter that time and time again exposed atrocities in the New York mental hospital system, and also traveled around the world in 72 days - a world record.  She was very young when she went into the male-dominated journalism industry and showed no fear. A trait I can only aspire to emulate. Another woman I learned about while living in the south was Daisy Bates, she helped found one of the first black newspapers that were dedicated to the civil rights movement in Little Rock. (Can you tell I was obsessed with journalism as a kid??) She has a huge hand in ending segregation and was able to make a peaceful impact on the movement through her words and actions. What a queen. When I think about these women who didn't blink an eye at the challenges they would face it makes me feel like I can truly overcome any obstacle in my way. Their inspiration flows through me. - Rachel Bryan

I was a huge fan of Joan of Arc and Helen Keller. They had the strength and determination that I always aspired to have. Again, being a shy kid and not really knowing it was okay to speak my truth made me admire their grit. - Elise Michaels

Harriet Tubman, Madame CJ Walker, and Octavia Butler. - Raena Boston

I feel like I should give Meghan Markle a shout-out right here, because, damn! She rocks. But, the person that has always brought me back, time and again for her wonderful work, authorship, and forward-thinking is Louisa May Alcott. I love her novels, and how they portray the strength, courage, and love of women. I love her underlying messages of hope. She inspired me to be a writer, and for that, I am so grateful. - Elisabeth Thomas

If you could tell your 16-year-old self anything about what being a woman means, what would it be?

Being a woman has nothing to do with the male gaze. Do whatever it is you want to do. - Raena Boston

Follow your intuition at all times. And do not (repeat DO NOT) let any boy determine who you are, what you want to do, where you want to go. - Elise Michaels 

Being a woman means whatever you want it to mean. Do not ever let someone put you in a box or tell you what it is supposed to signify. Growing up in the south there was a lot of pressure to go down a certain path and have a certain order to my life. Pressure around how to act, how to dress. But I would like to shake myself and tell her - go with your gut and be who you are. If you break out of the box you are put in you will be happier than you ever thought. - Rachel Bryan

No one, not a single person, can determine your worth but you. If you believe in your path and your choices, they will work out for you. But if you let yourself be swayed by the winds of other people’s realities, you will lose sight of who you truly are. Don’t sway. Stay the course! - Elisabeth Thomas

Where do you feel the world needs to change so that women can thrive? 

Firstly, someone should be walking in front of us, throwing down rose petals for us to walk on. Then they not only need to give us all raises but give us big fat checks to make up for all the years we were paid so poorly while doing the same work as men. Seriously, though, women need to be heard. And, not only heard but what we say should be acted upon. 

All women know how we have been wronged or poo-pooed because of centuries of dismissive culture. We see it, and boy do we know it when we see it. Women in positions of power and leadership need to be seen as the norm. I cannot wait until we are past the "First woman to....." - Elise Michaels

Pay us. Subsidize childcare. Give us paid family leave. We need equitable policies that allow women to thrive. - Raena Boston

We have to start spreading out the responsibilities and supporting women and mothers. All these reports that have come out saying that working moms are on the brink (or past the brink) during the pandemic do nothing but frustrate us. Okay - so what now? Now you are aware we are collapsing on a daily basis, what are you going to do about it? We need to see action at the policy level, at the business level, and at home. Women can not continue to straddle all responsibilities without some level of relief or support. - Rachel Bryan

Stop utilizing us as puppets and pitting us against each other. And I don’t just see men doing this, we women need to stop perpetuating the negative stereotypes, and institutionalized sexist beliefs as well. We are better than that. Let’s do better for each other and our children. - Elisabeth Thomas

Thanks to you, wonderful women, who helped me with this post and are helping make the world we want to see just be living, breathing, and being. I so appreciate, and all women. 

Let’s move forward together from this International Women’s Day and Women’s History Month with a fire within us to tell our everyday stories.

xo

Meet the women from this post below!